What I really meant to say

My brother is leaving for college today. Since he may or may not return this summer, he may be away 'til next December. I will officially Not See Him until this summer, at least. Coupled with this is the facct that my sister recently won a French scholarship and will be away for the entire month of July. I will have our PC just to myself for an entire month.

I need to learn how to drive by then.

My 'road test' was yesterday. I made a lot of mistakes, and my brother said that he got his license two weeks after getting his permit°. I pointed out that he had been training since thirteen at the time, meaning four years experience. I had barely been training a year, and only rarely. He changed the subject: Maybe I would like to drive an automatic first?

That really stung.

This, of course, occured after I narrowly missed a police car while pulling out.

I am going to learn how to drive by March. My mother said she will stop paying bus fare by then,° and I'm sick of those things anyway.

My point is, I need to become more independant. I need to stop slacking on school work, and get a job. Most importantly, I need a small army of ninjas.°

P.S.: Wait...Ali can buy me a Jump/Flash Drive and a Wacom. Yesss.

1. Required by law in the Bahamas.
2. I'm not sure what effect that would have, as she doesn't pay bus fare now.
3. Just as long as I meet no pirates.
//is that I'm sorry for the way I am

14 01 05 Breakup.

I was watching VH1's Top 20 Video Countdown. My brother came in and Told me that Brad and Rachel broke up.

Hilarity ensued.
//to everyone he meets, he stays a stranger.

090105 Ohcrap

Earlier today, like, minutes ago, I was enveloped in an effusive huge by a large, middle-aged black woman.

I hate hugs by a large, middle-aged black women.

Including my mother.

The woman in question, to be sure, is on my list of "good people", a list which also includes Bill Cosby and Mace Windu. She's a devout Baptist, a good cook, and sends my family food sometimes, especially when my brother is home from college.

But she hugs too much.

My theory is that she views my brother as a son.* When he's away, I become the surrogate Ali, even though I'm taller by an inch, and he has 25 pounds on me. Whatever the cause, she hugs me in a way that I don't let my own mother. The only bosoms I ever want to lay my weary head upon belong to Jesus, my future wife, and Cameron Diaz.* I trust issues I think I have can only be exacerbated by assault glomping by a woman twice my size and weight.* Eventually, I'll turn into Tony Shaloub's Monk. Hopefully I'll dress better.

In lcal news, a local 18 year old is finding himself seriously challanged to find motivation for his art. More at

One of our deacons just got carried out of church.[hr]

The entry above, including the foootnotes, was written yesterday in church. The deacon in question underwent a quintuple bypass several years ago. I remmber the sory, because my mother used it to convince me not to eat another egg. Seriously. I believe I was ten. The guy was 50 then. In retrospect, a quint bypass might not have been immediately precipitated by one more egg.

1.Yes, she has a son. But he's ten or so. My brother's, what, 23?
2.Preferably in reverse order.
3.Conservatively.

//everytime you walk into the room·I'm afraid to move

G4 has lost it's freaking mind.

I did not, originally, type "freaking" in the title.

Ahem.

When Read or Die aired on Adult Swim a week or two ago, I was pleasantly surprised. R.o.D. was actually pretty good, and I could really empathize with the main character, Yomiko Readman, a girl so engrossed in books that her house is lined in them she ignores a car accident happening right in front of her. That, of course, has never happened to me, though I have nearly caused several accidents through my bibliophilia. Watching the Movie was key to understanding the event in R.o.D the TV(OAV), or in plain English, the series.

This series was airing on G4TechTv's "Anime Unleashed." Monday night I turn on my television to find family guy returned to it's regular time slot.(They always switch it with Futurama during sweeps, and I don't know why.) I was also surprised to find Unscrewed missing, as well as AU. No one seemed to have informed TV Guide channel of the change, however.

This leaves the program formerly known as The Screen Savers, and X-Play, which G4 is also slowly chipping away at. They started by giving them a new set which wouldn't be so bad if I was colourblind. The elements of that thing all clash. And what are they doing with the bar? Kids watch the show! They don't need a bar! Exclamation mark!

Also, the name is being changed back to G4 in the spring. They are dropping all pretense now.

EDIT: Hmm. They seem to have moved it to 1 AM in the morning. Strange. XPlay and AU were all they had to compete with Adult Swim, the Daily Show, and other late night stuff.

//why don't we gyre and gimble in the wabe